Satisfied…or am I?

It had all been bliss….commitment, it’s a beautiful thing. As you might have noticed, I write here when something in my heart and mind is not right. I write here to let it all out. I write here so I can surrender myself, the fact that I am sometimes, quite messed up.

I met a new friend. It was insignificant how we met, but the moment I set eyes on him, there was chemistry. I’m not talking about love here, but have you ever been in a room of hundreds of people and at least one person stood out? It was like that.

So, we talked, and now we’re friends. We really clicked, there’s so much we could talk about. As usual, he’s attached and so am I. That’s fine, but I can’t help but wonder why a normal boy and girl can’t be just friends. There’s always something sexual about a boy girl relationship, by that I don’t mean literally sex. For me, if I was close to a guy friend, and you can be buddies and all, and you can be happily attached yourself, but when you’re too close, there’s that other kind of attraction which I can’t explain that you don’t find with same sex friendships. Is that normal?

So, it was to the point where I can’t wait for our next conversation, we joked and talked, but no, we don’t flirt. Draw the line. But there’s that small yearning and excitement of meeting again. Maybe this is due to the beginning of friendships which will eventually wear off. I try to tell myself to stop being so analytical, can’t I just appreciate a friendship as it is. I really don’t understand how some people can be best friends with a another guy without falling in love with him. Beats me.